“F” – FOOEY! My Husband’s Mistress (Chocolate) Must Go!

“No chocolate for you,”

The doctor declared

“You have diabetes,

Now go get prepared.

**********

Clean out all your cupboards

And dump all the pie

For if you should eat it,

You surely might die.

**********

No rice, no spaghetti

No cookies and cream,”

But when he said “chocolate,”

I heard Edward scream.

**********

“No chocolate?” Ed cried,

“You must be mistaken!

I can’t live without it!”

His voice started shakin’.

**********

“Those chocolaty coco’s,

My breakfast each day

Will not understand

If I toss them away!”

**********

“It’s egg-whites for you!”

The doctor replied.

“Your chocolaty cravings

Must now be denied!”

**********

But Edward and chocolate

Had always been pals

His love for her lasted

Beyond other gals

**********

How could they part ways

After all of these years?

That darn diabetes

Brought Edward to tears.

**********

To test his blood sugar

And live with a pump

Was nothing compared

To a full chocolate dump.

**********

Pricking his finger

Throughout every day

Was simple, but

Throwing his chocolate away?

**********

My husband was facing

A true lifestyle change,

To keep his blood glucose

Within normal range.

**********

He must walk away

When chocolate is near,

Or else “come and get me,”

Is all that he’ll hear.

**********

Chocolate, the temptress,

My husband’s old flame,

is part  of our past now,

It’s just such a shame.

**********

I know my dear Edward

Is missing his treat,

Now green beans and turkey

Is all he can eat!

**********

Then, finally it hit him,

He said it aloud,

“I can’t have my chocolate,”

And he held his head proud.

*********

“Fooey!” said Edward,

“No chocolate for me,

I guess I’ll just stick with

What’s all sugar free.”

**********

But Edward’s a fighter

He often still tries

To sneak in “real” chocolate

And hide it with lies.

**********

But evidence lingers,

A smudge on his skin,

And I know he and chocolate

Were at it again.

**********

“You know you can’t do that,”

I’ll remind, with a frown.

“It was only a nibble,”

He’ll reply, looking down.

**********

He’ll eat sugar free stuff,

His healthier pal,

But nothing compares to

His old chocolate gal.

**********

I thought it was over,

His chocolate affair,

But he still sneaks to see her

They’re a stubborn ole’ pair!

**********

When I heard, “no more chocolate,”

The doctor’s decree,

I thought, “Now my husband

Can focus on me.”

**********

But still, that sweet chocolate,

She tickles his fancy

And he always indulges

Though he knows it is chancy.

**********

“Fooey! No chocolate!”

Those words were so hollow,

For where chocolate’s hiding

My husband will follow.

**********

My Edward is stubborn

Diabetes is more

But the most stubborn minded

Is chocolate – that whore!